They don’t call neonatal a rollercoaster for nothing. We had climbed high, clogs turning, the chinking of the chains dragging us up and up from the depths notch by notch.I had been down there, with Day leaving, Arlo not making progress and being left alone, I was a mess. Day was so concerned about me being alone that he organised for one of my old friends to come visit. She only lived not so far away and I was so grateful for the company, just someone to come and sit with me for an hour or so, talking nonsense and catching up on gossip was exactly what I needed. And the fact Arlo had decided to turn a corner had...
First meetingsC section mum's with babies in neonatal always recover quickly.That's what the midwife told me as I heaved myself off the bed and into the wheel-chair. Some people think having a c section is the easier way of giving birth. I can assure you that is doesn't feel it when you have to lever yourself up without the use of your stomach muscles because they have been hacked open! But when you have an amazing little warrior in the neonatal unit, that you've yet to meet, you'll do anything to be by their side.The trip down the corridor seemed to take forever. I just wanted to be with him. I felt sick with anticipation, I just didn't know what...
I was wheeled out of the Neonatal Unit back to labour and delivery, but was allowed to return to my room on the maternity base. I say wheeled, I mean pushed. Pushed or I would never have left. I could have sat there all night and zoned out everything around me. Leaving Arlo was the last thing I wanted to do, but it was clear to everyone how absolutely exhausted I was. I had protested a few times and bought myself a few more moments with our boy. Day was concerned about Arlo, but about me too. Back in the room he was put up on a camp bed next to me. We both fell into bed absolutely exhausted. (Day...
You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.Never has there been a truer word spoken. And if you ask me, I wouldn't describe myself as strong. Because truly, I'm not, I wasn't; I didn't feel it. Even now, after everything, I'm not strong, I just don't have any other choice if I'm to make it through the day.The midwife picked up the scan and shook her head. "I'm just going to leave you on he monitor a little longer." With that she tried a friendly smile as she glanced back at the baby's heart and darted out the door. With a moment to myself, I had time to think. But I quickly...
A rollercoaster of emotionsHe didn't want to and I certainly didn't want him to, but Day returned home that night. As much as I needed him, so did Alfie and he had to go to work. It broke my heart once again, but I was too tired to dwell on anything! I needed to recharge.The next day I was sent for a scan at the foetal medicine unit. I'd love to say I was feeling happier and more positive, but that would be untrue. I was a complete mess. The past few days had physically and emotionally drained me. While waiting in the waiting room I couldn't stop crying! The tears constantly welled in my eyes and overflowed down my...
